Wednesday, November 14, 2012

How My Husband Inadvertently Made Me Cry

This is a truly tragic tale.  Brace yourselves.

There is a board game store here that my husband loves.  

A new location has been slated to open up just around the corner from our house (on a street he NEVER, EVER drives on).

Well, yesterday, I was driving by, and noticed it was open!

I immediately planned a super-secret surprise date night.  I instantly called Matt and invited him to a surprise family outing for Friday night.  My plans were to picnic at a park, read books to Emily at Books a Million, and then accidentally drive by the open board game store and maybe possibly end up going in and making Matt's week!

...until Saturday, when he is attending the Southern Pinball Festival where, for only $15, he can play unlimited pinball for free until midnight.

...hence, I wanted to make his week on Friday before he has the best day ever on Saturday.  It's going to be a good weekend for him.


This morning (not 24 hours after I invited him on the super secret date) during breakfast, he said, "guess what's open!"

And I knew that he knew.

On the slightest chance that my obsessed husband was talking about something else, I said, "hmm?  What?"


And I immediately stomped my foot and burst into tears.

True story.

The punk has apparently been trolling their website waiting for news.

I was so angry!  And sad!  And crying!

I curtly informed him that he was a horrible person, and that there was no way that he should have known that, and that we were possibly going to accidentally drive by there on our super-secret family outing on Friday (the one I had just invited him on yesterday), and that I was really excited to surprise him, but that he had ruined it.

He laughed at me.

We will still go, and I'm probably the coolest wife he has ever had, but I'm a little sad about this turn of events, and I think he was quite out of line to be stalking them to find out when they were open, when I have specifically been checking every time I drive by (it's on the way to Aldi), with the express intent of surprising him with heretofore-unbeknownst-to-him information.


Friday, July 20, 2012

The Price of Procrastination

I have an amazing phone.  It's "smart" and I've come to rely on it a tad too much.  This is the story of how we unintentionally broke up.  It's slightly tragic.  Brace yourself.
Once upon a time, in a room far, far away down the hall, there lived a bathroom sink.  Unfortunately for the poor sink, there also lived a redhead with long, long red hair.

One day, the redhead's hair decided to visit the bathroom sink.  Unbeknownst to the lovely redhead (did I mention she's lovely?), the hair traveled down into the sink's drain.

Soon afterward, the drain couldn't squeeze water around the hair more than a little bit at a time, and thus, water began to back up in the sink.

Despite having the tools to fix it, the beautiful redhead chose to wait until later to deal with it.

One night, having stayed up very, very late (probably getting caught up on Downton Abbey or something), she was brushing her teeth before bed.

As she went to leave the bathroom, the redhead accidentally knocked her phone into the sink.  Had she but unclogged the drain sooner, this wouldn't have been such a tragedy.


The helpless phone took a bath.  

She immediately removed the battery and put the phone into a bag of rice, 
and all was well for nearly two months.

Now, two months later, it won't charge.  The lovely woman's gracious parents lent her a phone for the interim until she is eligible for an upgrade.

So, here is her wonderfully vintage/retro/new-to-her phone:

Sigh.  T9 Texting.  Remember that?  Without it, here is how I would type hello.

G-H  D-E  J-K-L  J-K-L  M-N-O

Man, do I have a renewed appreciation for things like GPS navigation (on my phone), email (on my phone), a full QWERTY keyboard (on my phone), etc.

Try not to be jealous.

Anyway, let this be a lesson to you.  Deal with the little annoyances while they're still little.

There's a verse James 4:17, "Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do, and doesn't do it sins."  

Sin is missing the mark of perfection.  Sin always has undesirable consequences.
 Had I done what needed to be done,  my phone and I could still have a happily co-dependent relationship.

Somehow, I feel that this lesson has vast reaching implications for all areas of my life. 

Again, try not to be jealous.


P.S. Just after I finished the post, my computer shut off. 
This was after warning me several times that it was out of battery.
Here's a print screen of what I saw just before it shut down:

Again, deal with the little stuff before it becomes a larger issue.  It's waaaay less annoying.


P.P.S.  Just as I finished typing the P.S., my computer automatically shut off, due to the automatic update feature (which was flashing in the toolbar, but I'd already postponed it once, so I thought I had time). 

So, lesson review (since I'm obviously slow): deal with little stuff immediately.  Also, if you sense that something could be an issue, take two seconds to look into it.  I totally could have postponed the stupid automatic shutdown again.  I was just being cocky.